[Hindi_Jokes] santa banta jokes
A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell. Santa doesn't turns up
for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I'm coming daily since 4 days, I
press the bell but no one comes out.
Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatoes 5 days ago,
he hasn't come back yet!
Santa: Why don't u cook something else?
An Englishman and Santa were inside the toilet.
Englishman: Good evening, how do you do?
Santa: Good evening, we open the zip and do!
Santa opened a petrol pump, but not even one customer went there.
You know why?
Because he opened petrol pump on second floor.
Ultimate answer while changing the job.
Interviewer: Why did you change your last job?
Santa: Because the company shifted and didn't tell me where.
Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover is crying
furiously...
Finally, Santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy, I will marry again.
Why did Santa keep the door open while bathing?
Because he was afraid that someone might watch him from the key hole.
Santa phoned his wife: I am not coming home. The steering, dash
board, gears of car have been stolen. After sometime he calls again:
I am coming home. Earlier, I sat on the back seat of my car.
Sardar wanted to make a STD call to Punjab & also save money. So
what did he do?
Simple, he went to Punjab and made a local call.
Oye paaji, apni pregnant wife ko itne dard mein hospital ki jagah
pizza hut kyun leja raha hai........
Sardarji: Kyun key pizza hut mein "Delivery Free" hai.
Sardarji, aapko bus me logo ne kyu mara?
Sardarji: Are yaar mere photo bus me niche gir gaya aur mene kaha
madam jara sari upper kijiye photo lena hai.....
A Sardar enters shop shouts, Where is my free gift with this oil?
Shopkeeper: Iske Saath koi gift nahin hai bhai saab
Sardar : Oye ispe likha hai CHOLESTROL FREE.
One tourist from U.S.A. asked to Sardar: Any great man born in this
village?
Sardar: no sir, only small Babies!!!
Teacher: A for?
Sardar: Apple
Teacher: Jor se bolo?
Sardar: Jay mata di.
American says: " US mein shaadi E-mail se hoti hai.."
Sardarji says: " India me to.. shaadi Fe-mail se hoti hai...!!!"
Sardar orders pizza.
Waiter: Sir shud I cut it into 4 pieces or into 8 pieces?
Sardar: 4 hi karde 8 khaye nahi jayenge
Santa dials a number. A girl receives the call.
Santa: Who r u?
Girl: Seeta here.
Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya
Banta: Truck dekhkar tum kaampte kyon ho?
Santa: Ek truck driver meri biwi lekar bhaag gaya tha , har baar
lagta hai jaise usko vapas karne aya hai.
Pathan sitting on the top of the mountain and studying. When a
person asked what he was doing?
He replied, Oye! Higher studies yaar.
2 Sardars were fighting after exam.
Sir: Why are you fighting?
1 Sardar: This fool left the answer sheet blank.
Sir: So what?
1 Sardar: Even I did the same thing, now teacher will think that we
both copied.
A sardar learning English introduces his family in the party:
Hi! I am sardar, this is my sardarni, he is my kid, & she is my
kidney.
Sardar 1: I'm very kanjoos, I went 2 honeymoon alone & saved 1/2
money.
Sardar 2: You r nothing I saved all my money, my friend was going &
I sent my wife with him.
-----Inline Attachment Follows-----
Santa: I have swallowed a key.
Doctor: When?
Santa: 3 months back!
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.
A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell. Santa doesn't turns up
for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I'm coming daily since 4 days, I
press the bell but no one comes out.
Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatoes 5 days ago,
he hasn't come back yet!
Santa: Why don't u cook something else?
An Englishman and Santa were inside the toilet.
Englishman: Good evening, how do you do?
Santa: Good evening, we open the zip and do!
Santa opened a petrol pump, but not even one customer went there.
You know why?
Because he opened petrol pump on second floor.
Ultimate answer while changing the job.
Interviewer: Why did you change your last job?
Santa: Because the company shifted and didn't tell me where.
Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover is crying
furiously...
Finally, Santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy, I will marry again.
Why did Santa keep the door open while bathing?
Because he was afraid that someone might watch him from the key hole.
Santa phoned his wife: I am not coming home. The steering, dash
board, gears of car have been stolen. After sometime he calls again:
I am coming home. Earlier, I sat on the back seat of my car.
Sardar wanted to make a STD call to Punjab & also save money. So
what did he do?
Simple, he went to Punjab and made a local call.
Oye paaji, apni pregnant wife ko itne dard mein hospital ki jagah
pizza hut kyun leja raha hai........
Sardarji: Kyun key pizza hut mein "Delivery Free" hai.
Sardarji, aapko bus me logo ne kyu mara?
Sardarji: Are yaar mere photo bus me niche gir gaya aur mene kaha
madam jara sari upper kijiye photo lena hai.....
A Sardar enters shop shouts, Where is my free gift with this oil?
Shopkeeper: Iske Saath koi gift nahin hai bhai saab
Sardar : Oye ispe likha hai CHOLESTROL FREE.
One tourist from U.S.A. asked to Sardar: Any great man born in this
village?
Sardar: no sir, only small Babies!!!
Teacher: A for?
Sardar: Apple
Teacher: Jor se bolo?
Sardar: Jay mata di.
American says: " US mein shaadi E-mail se hoti hai.."
Sardarji says: " India me to.. shaadi Fe-mail se hoti hai...!!!"
Sardar orders pizza.
Waiter: Sir shud I cut it into 4 pieces or into 8 pieces?
Sardar: 4 hi karde 8 khaye nahi jayenge
Santa dials a number. A girl receives the call.
Santa: Who r u?
Girl: Seeta here.
Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya
Banta: Truck dekhkar tum kaampte kyon ho?
Santa: Ek truck driver meri biwi lekar bhaag gaya tha , har baar
lagta hai jaise usko vapas karne aya hai.
Pathan sitting on the top of the mountain and studying. When a
person asked what he was doing?
He replied, Oye! Higher studies yaar.
2 Sardars were fighting after exam.
Sir: Why are you fighting?
1 Sardar: This fool left the answer sheet blank.
Sir: So what?
1 Sardar: Even I did the same thing, now teacher will think that we
both copied.
A sardar learning English introduces his family in the party:
Hi! I am sardar, this is my sardarni, he is my kid, & she is my
kidney.
Sardar 1: I'm very kanjoos, I went 2 honeymoon alone & saved 1/2
money.
Sardar 2: You r nothing I saved all my money, my friend was going &
I sent my wife with him.
------------
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Santa: I have swallowed a key.
Doctor: When?
Santa: 3 months back!
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.
A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell. Santa doesn't turns up
for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I'm coming daily since 4 days, I
press the bell but no one comes out.
Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatoes 5 days ago,
he hasn't come back yet!
Santa: Why don't u cook something else?
An Englishman and Santa were inside the toilet.
Englishman: Good evening, how do you do?
Santa: Good evening, we open the zip and do!
Santa opened a petrol pump, but not even one customer went there.
You know why?
Because he opened petrol pump on second floor.
Ultimate answer while changing the job.
Interviewer: Why did you change your last job?
Santa: Because the company shifted and didn't tell me where.
Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover is crying
furiously...
Finally, Santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy, I will marry again.
Why did Santa keep the door open while bathing?
Because he was afraid that someone might watch him from the key hole.
Santa phoned his wife: I am not coming home. The steering, dash
board, gears of car have been stolen. After sometime he calls again:
I am coming home. Earlier, I sat on the back seat of my car.
Sardar wanted to make a STD call to Punjab & also save money. So
what did he do?
Simple, he went to Punjab and made a local call.
Oye paaji, apni pregnant wife ko itne dard mein hospital ki jagah
pizza hut kyun leja raha hai........
Sardarji: Kyun key pizza hut mein "Delivery Free" hai.
Sardarji, aapko bus me logo ne kyu mara?
Sardarji: Are yaar mere photo bus me niche gir gaya aur mene kaha
madam jara sari upper kijiye photo lena hai.....
A Sardar enters shop shouts, Where is my free gift with this oil?
Shopkeeper: Iske Saath koi gift nahin hai bhai saab
Sardar : Oye ispe likha hai CHOLESTROL FREE.
One tourist from U.S.A. asked to Sardar: Any great man born in this
village?
Sardar: no sir, only small Babies!!!
Teacher: A for?
Sardar: Apple
Teacher: Jor se bolo?
Sardar: Jay mata di.
American says: " US mein shaadi E-mail se hoti hai.."
Sardarji says: " India me to.. shaadi Fe-mail se hoti hai...!!!"
Sardar orders pizza.
Waiter: Sir shud I cut it into 4 pieces or into 8 pieces?
Sardar: 4 hi karde 8 khaye nahi jayenge
Santa dials a number. A girl receives the call.
Santa: Who r u?
Girl: Seeta here.
Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya
Banta: Truck dekhkar tum kaampte kyon ho?
Santa: Ek truck driver meri biwi lekar bhaag gaya tha , har baar
lagta hai jaise usko vapas karne aya hai.
Pathan sitting on the top of the mountain and studying. When a
person asked what he was doing?
He replied, Oye! Higher studies yaar.
2 Sardars were fighting after exam.
Sir: Why are you fighting?
1 Sardar: This fool left the answer sheet blank.
Sir: So what?
1 Sardar: Even I did the same thing, now teacher will think that we
both copied.
A sardar learning English introduces his family in the party:
Hi! I am sardar, this is my sardarni, he is my kid, & she is my
kidney.
Sardar 1: I'm very kanjoos, I went 2 honeymoon alone & saved 1/2
money.
Sardar 2: You r nothing I saved all my money, my friend was going &
I sent my wife with him.
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posted by Raghubar at
8:05 AM
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